Celebrate

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David and I didn’t make it above tree line in November, and rather than regret that I’m celebrating all the months this year we did manage to hike and reach a peak or a view, our time in woods and wilderness.

But mostly I’m thinking about what we did in November instead of hiking, because it’s been a month with many reasons for celebration.  We spent a lot of time with family and friends, while finishing house projects in preparation for a big holiday weekend, full of even more family and friends.  On Thanksgiving, all four of our children were together for the first time, and after the big, and very fun, groups of visiting family left on Friday, we had an evening with the six of us and Matt and Emilio.  “First time eva,” as Adrienne posted on Facebook.  “What up now?”

Equally sweet was another big event we’ve been planning in secret — a marriage celebration.  On Thanksgiving night, after lighting the Hanukkah candles, David and I surprised everyone gathered in our living room by finally having a wedding.  We were married 18 months ago and we didn’t tell anyone for almost a year (the reasons for this are too complicated for a blog post), except for Emilio.  We told him two weeks before our appointment with the Rabbi, who married us.  Emilio was four months old at the time and we were pretty sure he could keep our secret.

So we never had a wedding and some of the people closest to us (especially my sister Chris) really wanted us to and we’d always planned to have a public ceremony of commitment, even before we were sure that would be a legal marriage, so we decided, why not here and now?

After a day of feasting and celebrating Thanksgivukkah, David and I spoke our vows to each other, in front of many of those closest to us.  And then we had cake and champagne, bounty on bounty.

David began by saying, We have Chris to thank for encouraging us to create this surprise and celebrate our marriage now.  We wanted all of our family to be here, especially our children and here they are, the first time they have all been together in one place at the same time.   So, rapere ad tempus in gloria.  Seize the glorious moment.  In the best of worlds everyone would be here, all the family and friends we would want as witness.  It’s rarely the best of worlds, always the world as it is, and this is it.  

I followed.  And this is the moment we’ve chosen to declare our commitment to each other publicly.  When we first told our children we were married, almost a year afterwards, Melia told us she wouldn’t consider us really married until we stood in front of people and said vows to each other. Chris has been urging us to celebrate our marriage sooner rather than later, and when we realized today we would have our four children gathered together, and so many of the family we love, we decided to celebrate today.  It’s a day of thanks and awareness of all there is to be grateful for, and David and I are so very grateful for what we have between us every day, it’s seems perfectly fitting to declare out marriage vows to each other today, with all of you as our witnesses.  To have a wedding. 

So we did.

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About Grace Mattern

Grace Mattern is a poet, writer, mother, grandmother, partner, friend, family member, gardener, triathlete, hiker and for 30 years was the Executive Director of the NH Coalition Against Domestic and Sexual Violence. She resigned her position at the Coalition on June 15, 2011 in order to concentrate on her writing, while continuing to engage in the movement to end violence against women as a consultant and advisor. Her chapbook Fever of Unknown Origin was published in 2001 and her full-length poetry book The Truth About Death was published in 2012.
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5 Responses to Celebrate

  1. Heartfelt congratulations, Grace!

  2. Anne Purinton says:

    So happy for you both, and your family! You make a lovely couple, in so many ways. What a special day that must have been. I love how you spring those surprises on everyone -never a dull moment around you two!

    Love and hugs to all,

    Antoinette

  3. svarnum says:

    Soooo glad you, David and your family had that moment! Happy for you both.
    Steve

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