A year ago today, not by the date but by the day, Emilio was born, early in the morning. I came back to Adrienne and Matt’s house to get a few hours of sleep, after having been up for most of two nights. Sam woke up when I came in and I called up the stairs to him. “You’re an uncle, and you win, you have a nephew.” He was really hoping for a boy.
This morning Adrienne brought Emilio in to me, in bed, a bit before 7:00. She went back to sleep, and I lay under the covers with Emilio tucked up next to me. Adrienne had handed him a little plastic penguin and he slapped it against the pillow, over and over. We were both drifting a bit in the early light just starting to come through the window blinds, warm and comfortable.
Then I heard my phone vibrate, and a few moments later, vibrate again. I got up to the expected text from David. His mother died early this morning, he was going to bed to try to get a few hours of sleep.
What a year it’s been.
Grace Mattern 
The whole cycle. Amid happiness, sadness lurks
Sorry for your sadness once again. Peace comes through acceptance and growth. Writing it out helps.
Hi Grace,
i just discovered you because I googled “floating in a river as surrender” for a parent letter I am writing based on the book Surrender to Love by David Benner. I am very interested in you and your writings. From what I have discovered so far you have experienced birth and loss and then rebirth. That is also the story of my life. “Grace’ is the predominate theme of my life because otherwise I would not be here to write this to you. I look forward to growing with you.
Larry
Welcome!